Brutalist
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Crimea And Donbass For Americans In Layman Terms

helgadagmar
@helgadagmar
on Nov 08, 2016 at 9:39AM in Geopolitics, Personal experience, Politics, Various, Europe

You’ve definitely heard the words of the Vice-President Joe Biden about Donbass special status. He said that for Ukraine granting special status to the Donbass is the same as for the US to give such status to Texas.

Well, let’s find out what the name of UNITED STATES OF AMERICA really means and what actually means to have each own legislature for each part.

A guy from Ukraine, who have visited the USA (Kentucky – the most typical America) and was inquired by the locals about the situation in Ukraine in the front, relationship with Russia, and etc, shares his experience and thoughts:

They ask me about the Crimea, and I am telling them – Well, just imagine that the USA and Mexico were one state, and then they decided to split, and Florida, Texas and California remained with the Latinos (a murmur of discontent is heard). And then a coup takes place in Mexico and the enemies of gringos seize the power (loud murmur of discontent), repressions start, English is being banned (the faces of the listeners express total lack of understanding of such heresy), and then people in Florida decide to be joined to the USA, and they manage to do it (!!! The elderly among the listeners are enraptured), and then rebellion sparked in Texas and the Mexico regime moving in the troops and starts to kill the Americans (the listeners clench their fists), and the President of the USA is scared of deploying his troops as Europe would not approve of it, and Canada would stop supplying Christmas trees (sincere indignation and discontent), but Texas rebuffs the enemy and the Latinos can no longer control the border, cannot kill the Americans and shell their cities (happy outcries and almost applause), although California and Nevada are still in the hands of the Latinos (!!!) – at this point one retired man loses patience, gets up and says:

I’ve always known that Obama is - (here goes a dirty word, so, let us say) - a bad guy!

Actually, after the guy showed them what the flag of Novorossia looks like, all the questions disappeared, as most people know that under the banner featuring St Andrew’s cross no bad men can fight.

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